THis was an article foster parent Robert Choo found in the NY times. I was amazed to see it was here in MA! cool!
Creating a Village to Foster a Child
James Estrin/The New York Times
By PAM BELLUCK
Published: August 16, 2007
EASTHAMPTON, Mass.
AS a psychotherapist, Wendy Gannett thought she was well equipped to adopt children from the foster care system. “I worked with troubled kids and I saw the horrors,” she said. “I knew firsthand how trying it was.”
But two years ago when she took in a 7-year-old boy named Alex, things quickly got away from her. He had been sexually abused and deprived of food, would turn defiant and even violent, and was so afraid of starving that Ms. Gannett let him sleep with his lunchbox. After a few months his younger sisters, Tanisha and Meraliz, joined them because Ms. Gannett said Alex “wasn’t going to be whole without them.”
Caring for all three made Ms. Gannett feel completely overwhelmed, she said. She quit her job to focus on the children and is living on food stamps and payments from the foster care system. Her friends “freaked out — they couldn’t handle the intensity of the kids,” she said. “I started going to church suppers where I said, I have these three kids. Who will help me?”
Then, last December, Ms. Gannett, 40, moved the family from their home in nearby Northampton, Mass., to an unusual community here called Treehouse. Opened in June of 2006, it was designed to bring together families like hers with each other and with older adults who would act, in the words of its founder, Judy Cockerton, as “honorary grandparents.” Soon, Rosa Young, 63, who had just arrived from Michigan, and Alan Spanier, a 73-year-old former Manhattanite, were babysitting for the children and picking them up from school. And Anna Kirwan, 58, from Sunderland, Mass., was helping out in the morning.
Treehouse is a planned intergenerational community, created in the hope that a close-knit support network can prevent children from bouncing from one foster home to another and give them tools to succeed. So far, there are few such communities. But the concept, pioneered in 1994 by Hope Meadows, at a former military base in Rantoul, Ill., is catching on. Hope Meadows plans to replicate in about 18 states, with the help of $7.7 million from the W. K. Kellogg Foundation, said Ted Chen, a program director for the foundation. Other nonprofit organizations are planning similar projects in California, Connecticut and North Carolina.
“It seems to have the capacity of working a lot better than a caseworker visiting two times a month,” said Tom Berkshire, a former chief of staff for the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services, who observed Hope Meadows closely. “The issues that foster kids have — this deals with a lot of them. The issue of graduating out of the system at 18, the issue of having role models to follow, the issue of ‘I know where I belong.’ ”
Ms. Cockerton believes the model may also have more widespread effects. “We’re really trying to inspire the nation to think very differently about the 800,000 children in foster care,” she said. It also aims to allow older adults to remain purposeful and avoid the isolation of old age.
Not that Treehouse is a utopia. Early tension with the local school system has not completely dissipated. One child left because things did not work out with a foster family, and not all the older residents have assumed the grandparent role. Still, Harry Spence, who until last May was commissioner of the state’s Department of Social Services, said Treehouse, which has a waiting list of 45 older adults and 15 families, is a “crucial experiment” that could also generate ideas about how to help foster children in conventional neighborhoods.
Those ideas could include Treehouse’s animal therapy and gardening programs, or its methods of helping parents make decisions, said Sarah Greenblatt, director of the Casey Center for Effective Child Welfare Practice, a Treehouse consultant.
Ms. Cockerton, 56, a former teacher and toy shop owner, said the project was inspired by her experience of adopting a child from foster care in 1999. Foster children and adoptive families she met felt stigmatized or “invisible,” she said, because people viewed the children as damaged.
Treehouse, a $15.9 million project, was built on a meadow near Springfield and Holyoke, two cities with large populations of foster children. Ms. Cockerton’s nonprofit Treehouse Foundation and the developer, Beacon Communities Development, got help from federal and state tax credits, said Pamela Goodman, president of Beacon Communities. The community’s 12 family homes and 48 homes for “elders,” as older residents are called — a ratio that Treehouse considered workable — are arranged in clusters, designed to resemble “dollhouses with their entries turned slightly so that every person who leaves their home has the opportunity to engage with someone,” Ms. Cockerton said.
The residents — currently 52 elders and 18 parents with 34 children — have diverse motivations for being here. Carmen Hickley, 46, said she came for safety, to escape “the man I married who was starting to mess with one of my children.” She has three biological children and four children who adopted after they were removed in 1998 from a home in which one boy was burned, tied up and had two teeth removed with pliers. In their Springfield neighborhood, she said, the children “weren’t allowed to ride their bicycles where I couldn’t see them, but now they can.”
Pam Lumpkin, 35, who has two biological children and a 12-year-old foster daughter, chose Treehouse because in her previous neighborhoods “there weren’t any other foster kids. Neighbors were always worried about how they were going to behave and whether they were going to break into their house.”
And Mary and Jack D’Amato wanted help raising Selena, 14, and Sarah, 12, sisters who were each previously in 24 different foster homes. “We’ve had crisis intervention teams in our house, we’ve been in family therapy,” said Ms. D’Amato, who is 48.
“Our hearts just went out to these kids,” said Mr. D’Amato, 53. “We couldn’t believe that they had been through so much abuse. But we realized we were only two people and we need to work as many.”
Since arriving in April, they have encountered “a new set of problems and a new set of joys,” said Mr. D’Amato. The girls have made new friendships, he said, “but with that came, how do they behave in those friendships? But the kids are happier with these kinds of challenges.”
Some residents may have been attracted by the income-based rents, which range from $511 (the lowest rent for a one-bedroom) to $1,015 (the highest rate for a 5-bedroom). Donna Robinson, 60, said she wanted to leave her “mold-infested rat hole” in Huntington, Mass.
But Mr. Spanier, a retired New York photographer who teaches the children photography and kite-flying, said he came to be involved in something positive. Ms. Young was drawn to the idea of “being extended family for foster families.”
Still, living in such a closely intertwined community and merging generations from varied backgrounds is “not an easy thing to do,” said Gary Anderson, dean of Michigan State University’s school of social work.
Indeed, Treehouse has had its share of disappointments in its first year. To gain support of Easthampton residents and ease the impact on local schools of children likely to need extra help, Treehouse financed several school programs, including after-school activities and a writer-in-residence. But just as the community was opening, Treehouse announced that money had run out.
“We discovered their word didn’t mean what we thought it did,” said Deborah N. Carter, the Easthampton schools superintendent. “It jaundices your view a little bit.”
Ms. Cockerton said she felt “such shame” about the situation.
In January, Edgar L. Selavka, a foster parent and preschool teacher, was arrested on charges of possessing child pornography. There was no evidence that children at Treehouse were involved, but Mr. Selavka and his wife, with a 7-year-old daughter and a 3-year-old foster daughter, were asked to leave, and residents were shaken.
Several residents said Treehouse’s straightforward handling of the incident bolstered the community. Still, Robin Weingarten, Treehouse’s child and family program coordinator, said some residents may “feel set back in their ability to trust.”
One child’s departure in June underscored the fragility of foster family relationships, even with community support.
And not all elders have volunteered to help children or been successful in developing relationships with them. While Hope Meadows, the Illinois community, requires its older residents to volunteer at least six hours a week (and requires that one parent stay home with the children, paying them a salary to do so), Treehouse rejected the idea of similar requirements, said Kerry Homstead, the community facilitator, because “I don’t think most people are attracted to something because they have to do it.”
“We have some folks who jump right in,” Ms. Cockerton said. “We have a group of people who dip in and out. Then we have other people who are still standing behind their curtains and peeking out because they’re not sure how to behave.” Elizabeth Poudrier, 73, said, “When I first got here, I shied away. Then it dawned on me that we were all in the same boat, and I came out of that shell.”
Elders get training in using restraint when hugging or touching abused children, and in “how not to take children’s behavior personally,” Ms. Homstead said. “Nobody is being matched or encouraged to hook up with children until we have some sense of readiness.”
Bringing together children with traumatic backgrounds has advantages. Nathan Flannery, 13, one of four adopted siblings, is not alone in finding it easy to get along with some children, “because they’ve been through some of the same things.” But it can also create combustible combinations. “There are certain kids you don’t want to spend too much time together,” said Carolyn Burns, the executive director of Berkshire Children and Families, the social service agency here. “And people always have to be vigilant because something can trigger some reaction.”
Recently Sarah, one of the D’Amatos’ foster daughters, kicked Ms. Lumpkin’s 12-year-old son, Kenny, at the community center. She stormed off, and someone called Ms. D’Amato, who tried, with other mothers, to persuade Sarah to apologize.
“Even if somebody makes you mad, you can’t kick or hit them,” Ms. Lumpkin said.
“It was an accident,” Sarah said.
“No, it wasn’t,” Ms. Lumpkin said.
Ms. Hickley added: “You want to have a lot of friends, you got to have a good attitude.”
Despite such episodes, Ms. D’Amato said, Sarah is “healing in little ways,” spending more time on activities like drawing pictures.
“I like it here,” Sarah said. “We have a community." Meaningful connections have clearly been made.
Ms. Kirwan teaches writing workshops, where both Selena and Ms. D’Amato, have written cathartic stories about violence and abuse. The D’Amato girls serve elders breakfast at a Saturday cafe here, and call Ms. Poudrier “Nana.” Ms. Young and Mr. Spanier calm Ms. Gannett’s children with singing and conversation.
Ryan Flannery, 9, Nathan’s brother, withdrew after moving here, said his mother, Christine, 43. The Flannerys, who have two biological children (a third died as a toddler), moved to Treehouse because they wanted their children “to have more connections,” Ms. Flannery said. But it turned out that there were more preteens and teens than children Ryan’s age. And some of the programs they were expecting were not yet in place.
“It just seemed like nothing worked,” said Ms. Flannery, who began home-schooling Ryan.
But Ryan liked visiting Ms. Kirwan’s tchotchke-filled home and letting her cats climb on him. And Ms. Robinson invited him to garden, paint birdhouses and read to her dog. (Ryan has a little trouble reading, Ms. Robinson explained, “and dogs are nonjudgmental.”)
For her part, Ms. Robinson said, “Ryan brings out the kid in me. I’m over there with a butterfly net, hobbling around with a cane.”
“This is a different world,” she said. “There’s life here.”
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Sunday, August 19, 2007
old article
Kids Care Club: Membership Has Its RewardsHamilton-Wenham Chronicle, December 20, 2001
Each year, parents in Hamilton and Wenham sign up their children for a smattering of after-school activities. A dose of sports can be combined with a few hours of drama and, depending on one's schedule, maybe a musical instrument can be squeezed in.
Most parents have assumed lessons that fostered empathy, charity and generosity were only offered on Sunday mornings. For nearly five years, however, the Kids Care Club has been meeting, after hours, at the Cutler Elementary School, helping children and their families experience the joy of reaching out to others.
Each month, between 20-50 children meet to plan and carry out a different charitable project. Fleece jackets have been collected and shipped to Nepal. Lunch snacks and drinks have been donated to Acord Food Pantry. Hats have been decorated and delivered to children at the Dana-Faber Cancer Institute.
This month, in conjunction with a grant from Sears and the Points of Light Foundation, children in the Kids Care Club made holiday hope chests for children in the care of the state's Department of Social Services (DSS). The grant from Sears allowed each child to buy $15 worth of merchandise at Sears, for a child of a given age and gender.
After school, children decorated their gift-filled boxes, each of which will be given to a child either in foster care or under the DSS supervision. The holiday hope chests will supplement the one gift each of these children receives from the DSS.
"Many of these children move frequently from one placement to another, so the idea of a hope chest is that it is a fancy decorated box that they'll be able to keep their possessions in when they go from place to place," said Kids Care Club organizer Dolly McIlvaine.
"We were asked not to forget the teenage population, [youngsters who] often get overlooked," said McIlvaine, who noted some of the boxes will go to teenagers in DSS care.
Carla King, foster parent recruiter for the Salem office of the Department of Social Services, is thrilled the Kids Care Club thought of the children in social services.
"Most kids in foster care come with nothing, so the holiday hope chest gives them something to call their own as they move into that foster home," explained King. "A lot of times, all they have are the clothes on their back," she added.
Holiday hope chests will also go to children in need who are still living with their parents.
"For a child in need, this is going to provide an extra gift they can put under the tree," said King.
King's office serves more than 300 foster children and 700 children at home but in need, all in the Essex County region.
"I'm so happy that the kids thought of our kids. And it is very much appreciated." King assured.
Debbie Spaide, a mother of five in Connecticut, initiated the Kids Care Club. Spaide and her husband often planned community service projects for their children and their friends. She eventually formalized the events and created a club around them. In early 1996, Kathy Mullin, a Cutler school parent, suggested the idea might work at her child's school.
Caption: Second-graders Joy Santarelli, front, and Rachel Landis prepare holiday hope chests at the Kids Care Club. "Mullin felt very strongly that even young children could reach out and impact others in need beyond their own little circle," said McIlvaine. Less than a year later, the Cutler-based club welcomed its first members.
Each year, as word has spread, the Kids Care Club's numbers grow.
"Word is getting out about what we do," said McIlvaine.
Not all children partake in all projects; McIlvaine asks children to choose projects themselves. Parents are welcome and younger siblings are often included.
Each fall, club members rake leaves for local seniors.
"Seniors so enjoy seeing the little kids out there. And we always try to leave the yard looking better than we arrived," said McIlvaine. Other projects have included planting flowers at Patton Park, singing at nursing homes and sponsoring a coin drive for an elementary school located near the World Trade Center.
Many of the projects are coordinated with items collected from the Cutler student body at large, through the school's so-called "giving tree." A wooden "tree" with bins at its base for collecting items, it stands prominently in the Cutler school lobby. Each month, notices go out to students and their families, explaining the next collection. The tree has collected school supplies for HAWC, toiletries for homeless shelters and books for the North Shore Children's Hospital's "Reach Out and Read" program.
For one month, baby items were collected at the giving tree. Club members, with the help of an art teacher and a Spanish teacher, wrote notes and designed tote bags that were sent to new mothers in an impoverished area of New Mexico.
"That whole experience was just phenomenal," said McIlvaine. "The children learned about the poverty, where these young moms were coming home to cardboard shacks with absolutely no supplies for infants,"McIlvaine thinks the lessons learned in this after-school program are life lessons.
"Children in our community can be sheltered from the harsh realities of what is out there," said McIlvaine, who is also the school adjustment counselor. "That protection is okay, but I feel strongly that it's beneficial for the children to develop an understanding that there are people and children in totally different circumstances than themselves."
"And by a small act of kindness," she concluded, "they can truly have an impact on somebody else's life."
Each year, parents in Hamilton and Wenham sign up their children for a smattering of after-school activities. A dose of sports can be combined with a few hours of drama and, depending on one's schedule, maybe a musical instrument can be squeezed in.
Most parents have assumed lessons that fostered empathy, charity and generosity were only offered on Sunday mornings. For nearly five years, however, the Kids Care Club has been meeting, after hours, at the Cutler Elementary School, helping children and their families experience the joy of reaching out to others.
Each month, between 20-50 children meet to plan and carry out a different charitable project. Fleece jackets have been collected and shipped to Nepal. Lunch snacks and drinks have been donated to Acord Food Pantry. Hats have been decorated and delivered to children at the Dana-Faber Cancer Institute.
This month, in conjunction with a grant from Sears and the Points of Light Foundation, children in the Kids Care Club made holiday hope chests for children in the care of the state's Department of Social Services (DSS). The grant from Sears allowed each child to buy $15 worth of merchandise at Sears, for a child of a given age and gender.
After school, children decorated their gift-filled boxes, each of which will be given to a child either in foster care or under the DSS supervision. The holiday hope chests will supplement the one gift each of these children receives from the DSS.
"Many of these children move frequently from one placement to another, so the idea of a hope chest is that it is a fancy decorated box that they'll be able to keep their possessions in when they go from place to place," said Kids Care Club organizer Dolly McIlvaine.
"We were asked not to forget the teenage population, [youngsters who] often get overlooked," said McIlvaine, who noted some of the boxes will go to teenagers in DSS care.
Carla King, foster parent recruiter for the Salem office of the Department of Social Services, is thrilled the Kids Care Club thought of the children in social services.
"Most kids in foster care come with nothing, so the holiday hope chest gives them something to call their own as they move into that foster home," explained King. "A lot of times, all they have are the clothes on their back," she added.
Holiday hope chests will also go to children in need who are still living with their parents.
"For a child in need, this is going to provide an extra gift they can put under the tree," said King.
King's office serves more than 300 foster children and 700 children at home but in need, all in the Essex County region.
"I'm so happy that the kids thought of our kids. And it is very much appreciated." King assured.
Debbie Spaide, a mother of five in Connecticut, initiated the Kids Care Club. Spaide and her husband often planned community service projects for their children and their friends. She eventually formalized the events and created a club around them. In early 1996, Kathy Mullin, a Cutler school parent, suggested the idea might work at her child's school.
Caption: Second-graders Joy Santarelli, front, and Rachel Landis prepare holiday hope chests at the Kids Care Club. "Mullin felt very strongly that even young children could reach out and impact others in need beyond their own little circle," said McIlvaine. Less than a year later, the Cutler-based club welcomed its first members.
Each year, as word has spread, the Kids Care Club's numbers grow.
"Word is getting out about what we do," said McIlvaine.
Not all children partake in all projects; McIlvaine asks children to choose projects themselves. Parents are welcome and younger siblings are often included.
Each fall, club members rake leaves for local seniors.
"Seniors so enjoy seeing the little kids out there. And we always try to leave the yard looking better than we arrived," said McIlvaine. Other projects have included planting flowers at Patton Park, singing at nursing homes and sponsoring a coin drive for an elementary school located near the World Trade Center.
Many of the projects are coordinated with items collected from the Cutler student body at large, through the school's so-called "giving tree." A wooden "tree" with bins at its base for collecting items, it stands prominently in the Cutler school lobby. Each month, notices go out to students and their families, explaining the next collection. The tree has collected school supplies for HAWC, toiletries for homeless shelters and books for the North Shore Children's Hospital's "Reach Out and Read" program.
For one month, baby items were collected at the giving tree. Club members, with the help of an art teacher and a Spanish teacher, wrote notes and designed tote bags that were sent to new mothers in an impoverished area of New Mexico.
"That whole experience was just phenomenal," said McIlvaine. "The children learned about the poverty, where these young moms were coming home to cardboard shacks with absolutely no supplies for infants,"McIlvaine thinks the lessons learned in this after-school program are life lessons.
"Children in our community can be sheltered from the harsh realities of what is out there," said McIlvaine, who is also the school adjustment counselor. "That protection is okay, but I feel strongly that it's beneficial for the children to develop an understanding that there are people and children in totally different circumstances than themselves."
"And by a small act of kindness," she concluded, "they can truly have an impact on somebody else's life."
Old article I found online
Published: February 19, 2007 12:00 am
Small church makes a big difference for foster childrenBy Amanda McGregor , Staff writerSalem News
View as a multiple pages
SALEM - First Universalist is a small parish with a huge heart.Though the church has fewer than 50 active members, those members include eight families who provide foster care and/or have adopted children. For them, church is more than a place of worship - it has become a support group where parents share joys and tribulations and foster and adopted children are the norm, not the exception."It's very normalizing and that's incredibly important to them," said Jan Costa, who has been a foster mother for eight years and recently adopted a 2-year-old son."It's a gift," Kathleen Riley said of the church community. She and her husband, Steve Duguay, adopted their daughter Dora, 7, one year ago. "And Dora is our gift," Steve said.A service scheduled for Sunday, Feb. 25, will honor the unique community at the First Universalist Society of Salem. Families will share their experiences of adoption and foster care, and one girl plans to show her adoption scrapbook."People always have a very interesting reaction to our story," Joseph Buchanan of Salem said. "They say, 'You did what?'"Joseph and Agnes Buchanan, along with their son Ryan, 14, traveled to Kazakhstan for a month last spring to adopt Tanya, now 11."When you tell your story, some people just kind of melt," Agnes said. "They say, 'That's something I've been dreaming of doing.'"They hope the service will open other people's hearts, too.Ready for anythingLast Sunday, four toddlers roamed a nursery strewn with books and toys in the red brick, 1808 church off Bridge Street. Two of the babies were foster children; Anthony, nearly 3, was adopted by Jan Costa; and the fourth child's biological parents are members of the church."Foster children have a story they come with to the new family," said the Rev. Bill Robinson, interim minister at First Universalist. He and his wife are also adoptive parents."Some of the stories we hear are hard to believe - that things like this happen to such nice little kids," Robinson said. "So it's a different kind of an experience as a parent. I see (parishioners) talking to each other about their situations and I have conversations with them as well."
The families at First Universalist say they help each other through the paper trails, the foster care certification process, or just caring for children from various backgrounds."It is a bit of a Zen way of being," foster parent Joyce Prior of Beverly said, "because you don't know (what child will come into your life).""I keep clothing in my house for every age: zero to 5 years old," Christine DiSaia said."And if there's no baby in the crib, you just use it for storage," Costa said.The children (most of whom can't be named in the newspaper, for privacy reasons) said they don't necessarily talk about their histories with each other in Sunday school, but they find comfort in being together."When I first walked in and there were other foster kids here, it practically blew me away," Costa said. "I could bring my kids to a church where they were normal.""There is so much support to be found here," Prior said. She and her wife, Donna Blume, have provided foster care for nearly six years. "For me, it's spiritual in the sense of how we all make families in different ways. In a tiny little church, it's really quite remarkable."So many storiesDora, 7, had four families before she found her permanent home in Salem with Riley and Duguay. Tanya, 11, lived in an orphanage in Kazakhstan when the Buchanans found her nearly two years ago through an exchange program they read about in The Salem News. Another family at the church adopted two girls from Guatemala.Costa, a nurse who has three grown children, became a foster parent after her husband died of cancer. Over the years, around 100 children have come into her Salem home. Last year, baby Anthony arrived - and he never left."I just said, 'I can't let this one go,'" Costa said. "It will be a real pleasure to watch this child grow."Blume and Prior have been foster mothers to a teenage daughter for the last year and a half and Blume enjoys helping out at the church nursery."She's very interested in the story of each child, because she can relate," Prior said.Christine and Gene DiSaia of Lynn are foster parents to a 21-month-old boy and regularly provide short-term foster care. They take hot line cases from the state Department of Social Services, which means they can receive calls anytime, day or night, to take children into their home.
"People are just kind of used to it now," said Christine DiSaia, an attorney certified to practice in child welfare cases. "They'll say, 'Oh, Christine is showing up with three children today.'"Need for homesOn the North Shore and Cape Ann alone, there are roughly 375 foster children right now. In the same area, there are only 140 families who provide foster care, according to Carla King, who is the foster parent recruiter for the area office of the Department of Social Services."There's a huge need for foster homes," she said.King said her office now has a group of three sisters for whom they can't find a home. And she said adolescent and teenage foster children often have to be placed in a group home, which is a level of service they don't need. But there is no other choice when there aren't families to take them.The members of First Universalist in Salem invited King to attend the Feb. 25 service, where she plans to talk with people interested in foster care and adoption."I love working with foster families," said King, who has worked for DSS for more than a decade. "They are just the most amazing people - so generous and selfless. I love doing for them, because they do so much for others."For more information on foster care and adoption, call Carla King at the Department of Social Services at 978-825-3862.If you goWhat: "Growing Families Through Foster Care and Adoption," a special serviceWhere: First Universalist Society of Salem, 211 Bridge St.When: Sunday, Feb. 25, 10:45 a.m.
Small church makes a big difference for foster childrenBy Amanda McGregor , Staff writerSalem News
View as a multiple pages
SALEM - First Universalist is a small parish with a huge heart.Though the church has fewer than 50 active members, those members include eight families who provide foster care and/or have adopted children. For them, church is more than a place of worship - it has become a support group where parents share joys and tribulations and foster and adopted children are the norm, not the exception."It's very normalizing and that's incredibly important to them," said Jan Costa, who has been a foster mother for eight years and recently adopted a 2-year-old son."It's a gift," Kathleen Riley said of the church community. She and her husband, Steve Duguay, adopted their daughter Dora, 7, one year ago. "And Dora is our gift," Steve said.A service scheduled for Sunday, Feb. 25, will honor the unique community at the First Universalist Society of Salem. Families will share their experiences of adoption and foster care, and one girl plans to show her adoption scrapbook."People always have a very interesting reaction to our story," Joseph Buchanan of Salem said. "They say, 'You did what?'"Joseph and Agnes Buchanan, along with their son Ryan, 14, traveled to Kazakhstan for a month last spring to adopt Tanya, now 11."When you tell your story, some people just kind of melt," Agnes said. "They say, 'That's something I've been dreaming of doing.'"They hope the service will open other people's hearts, too.Ready for anythingLast Sunday, four toddlers roamed a nursery strewn with books and toys in the red brick, 1808 church off Bridge Street. Two of the babies were foster children; Anthony, nearly 3, was adopted by Jan Costa; and the fourth child's biological parents are members of the church."Foster children have a story they come with to the new family," said the Rev. Bill Robinson, interim minister at First Universalist. He and his wife are also adoptive parents."Some of the stories we hear are hard to believe - that things like this happen to such nice little kids," Robinson said. "So it's a different kind of an experience as a parent. I see (parishioners) talking to each other about their situations and I have conversations with them as well."
The families at First Universalist say they help each other through the paper trails, the foster care certification process, or just caring for children from various backgrounds."It is a bit of a Zen way of being," foster parent Joyce Prior of Beverly said, "because you don't know (what child will come into your life).""I keep clothing in my house for every age: zero to 5 years old," Christine DiSaia said."And if there's no baby in the crib, you just use it for storage," Costa said.The children (most of whom can't be named in the newspaper, for privacy reasons) said they don't necessarily talk about their histories with each other in Sunday school, but they find comfort in being together."When I first walked in and there were other foster kids here, it practically blew me away," Costa said. "I could bring my kids to a church where they were normal.""There is so much support to be found here," Prior said. She and her wife, Donna Blume, have provided foster care for nearly six years. "For me, it's spiritual in the sense of how we all make families in different ways. In a tiny little church, it's really quite remarkable."So many storiesDora, 7, had four families before she found her permanent home in Salem with Riley and Duguay. Tanya, 11, lived in an orphanage in Kazakhstan when the Buchanans found her nearly two years ago through an exchange program they read about in The Salem News. Another family at the church adopted two girls from Guatemala.Costa, a nurse who has three grown children, became a foster parent after her husband died of cancer. Over the years, around 100 children have come into her Salem home. Last year, baby Anthony arrived - and he never left."I just said, 'I can't let this one go,'" Costa said. "It will be a real pleasure to watch this child grow."Blume and Prior have been foster mothers to a teenage daughter for the last year and a half and Blume enjoys helping out at the church nursery."She's very interested in the story of each child, because she can relate," Prior said.Christine and Gene DiSaia of Lynn are foster parents to a 21-month-old boy and regularly provide short-term foster care. They take hot line cases from the state Department of Social Services, which means they can receive calls anytime, day or night, to take children into their home.
"People are just kind of used to it now," said Christine DiSaia, an attorney certified to practice in child welfare cases. "They'll say, 'Oh, Christine is showing up with three children today.'"Need for homesOn the North Shore and Cape Ann alone, there are roughly 375 foster children right now. In the same area, there are only 140 families who provide foster care, according to Carla King, who is the foster parent recruiter for the area office of the Department of Social Services."There's a huge need for foster homes," she said.King said her office now has a group of three sisters for whom they can't find a home. And she said adolescent and teenage foster children often have to be placed in a group home, which is a level of service they don't need. But there is no other choice when there aren't families to take them.The members of First Universalist in Salem invited King to attend the Feb. 25 service, where she plans to talk with people interested in foster care and adoption."I love working with foster families," said King, who has worked for DSS for more than a decade. "They are just the most amazing people - so generous and selfless. I love doing for them, because they do so much for others."For more information on foster care and adoption, call Carla King at the Department of Social Services at 978-825-3862.If you goWhat: "Growing Families Through Foster Care and Adoption," a special serviceWhere: First Universalist Society of Salem, 211 Bridge St.When: Sunday, Feb. 25, 10:45 a.m.
Wednesday, August 1, 2007
Book Signing by Vicotoria Rowell
Star of film and television and author Victoria Rowell to speak at Barnes & Noble Thursday, August 2 at 7:00 pm
Barnes & Noble, in partnership with the Department of Social Service, Cape Cod and Islands Area Office, is pleased to host a book discussion and signing with actress and author, Victoria Rowell on Thursday, August 2 at 7:00 pm.
Victoria Rowell was born a Ward of the State in Portland, Maine, the child of an unmarried Yankee blueblood mother and an unknown black father. She was raised in foster care for 18 years. Her experience in the foster-care system was nothing short of miraculous, thanks to many extraordinary women who stepped forward to love, nurture, guide, teach and challenge her. At the age of eight, she received the Ford Foundation scholarship to the Cambridge School of Ballet, and by age sixteen, she earned scholarships to both the School of American Ballet and the American Ballet Theater of New York.
Her first book, The Women Who Raised Me, is tribute not only to her foster mothers, caretakers, social service workers, friends and mentors, but to the foster system that brought them into her life as well.
Victoria Rowell is a two-time Emmy Award nominee and an eleven-time NAACP Image Award-winning actress. Her professional credits include co-starring opposite Samuel L. Jackson in Home of the Brave, Jim Carrey in Dumb & Dumber, and Eddie Murphy in The Distinguished Gentleman and Eve’s Bayou. She is well known for her roles on Diagnosis: Murder and The Young and the Restless.
Rowell is the founder of the Rowell Foster Children’s Positive Plan, which provides scholarships in the arts and education to foster and adopted youth. She serves as national spokesperson for the Annie E. Casey Foundation/Casey Family Services.
Barnes & Noble Booksellers is located in the Cape Cod Mall, 769 Iyannough Road, Hyannis. For more information, call Barnes & Noble at 508-962-6310. All events are free and open to the public.
Barnes & Noble, in partnership with the Department of Social Service, Cape Cod and Islands Area Office, is pleased to host a book discussion and signing with actress and author, Victoria Rowell on Thursday, August 2 at 7:00 pm.
Victoria Rowell was born a Ward of the State in Portland, Maine, the child of an unmarried Yankee blueblood mother and an unknown black father. She was raised in foster care for 18 years. Her experience in the foster-care system was nothing short of miraculous, thanks to many extraordinary women who stepped forward to love, nurture, guide, teach and challenge her. At the age of eight, she received the Ford Foundation scholarship to the Cambridge School of Ballet, and by age sixteen, she earned scholarships to both the School of American Ballet and the American Ballet Theater of New York.
Her first book, The Women Who Raised Me, is tribute not only to her foster mothers, caretakers, social service workers, friends and mentors, but to the foster system that brought them into her life as well.
Victoria Rowell is a two-time Emmy Award nominee and an eleven-time NAACP Image Award-winning actress. Her professional credits include co-starring opposite Samuel L. Jackson in Home of the Brave, Jim Carrey in Dumb & Dumber, and Eddie Murphy in The Distinguished Gentleman and Eve’s Bayou. She is well known for her roles on Diagnosis: Murder and The Young and the Restless.
Rowell is the founder of the Rowell Foster Children’s Positive Plan, which provides scholarships in the arts and education to foster and adopted youth. She serves as national spokesperson for the Annie E. Casey Foundation/Casey Family Services.
Barnes & Noble Booksellers is located in the Cape Cod Mall, 769 Iyannough Road, Hyannis. For more information, call Barnes & Noble at 508-962-6310. All events are free and open to the public.
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